When I first went vegetarian, I immediately felt better, both physically and mentally. (I’ve described this feeling before.) Knowing that I was no longer contributing to the horrors of the meat industry, I felt like a weight had been lifted. I felt good about myself because I was choosing a compassionate lifestyle. I felt more at peace with my effects on nature and on Earth’s creatures. I felt like I was now a positive force in the circle of life. It felt enlightening, it felt good, and it made me happier.
I often compare my switch to vegetarianism to someone finding religion – you experience joy and peacefulness, and you just know in your heart that it is right. And just like with anything that makes you feel great, you want to share it with others. So I did. I’d often spout off horror stories of animal abuse, or disgusting tales about filthy meatpacking plants. I’d readily give out facts on cholesterol, heart disease, and cancer, unsolicited. I’d lecture on the link between the meat industry and environmental destruction. Every chance I got, I’d step up on that soapbox and give my vegetarian sermon. Without even realizing it, I had become the preachy vegetarian.
As I became aware of my newly acquired annoying habit (thanks in large part to my boyfriend who pointed it out to me every time I opened my mouth about anything related to vegetarianism), I realized that this approach was not going to work and might even turn people off of vegetarianism.
[I actually started this blog so I could still have my soapbox, but in a less obtrusive, less in-your-face kind of way. When someone asks me why I'm vegetarian (which nearly everyone does), it's easy for me to give them a simple answer then point them to my url. And though I still preach quite a bit here, everyone has the choice of whether they want to read it or not.]
Even with my blog as an outlet, it’s still so hard to keep quiet when I see friends chowing down chili-cheese covered hot dogs, double bacon cheeseburgers, or worse, veal. I want so badly to tell them how cruel and unhealthy their meal is, but I don’t want to perpetuate the stereotype that all vegetarians do is try to convert meat-eaters. I know that many vegetarians struggle with this same issue – how to inform people without sounding preachy.
What’s a vegetarian to do?
1. Don’t bring it up unless specifically asked
This is the approach I’ve chosen (for better or for worse). I know you’re dying to tell everyone everything, but the reality is that not everyone wants to know everything. And unsolicited vegetarian propaganda can actually repel people from vegetarianism, so until someone asks, zip it! The good new is that, inevitably, plenty of people will ask.
Caveat: There are a few really close friends and family (boyfriend, mom & dad, very best friends who aren’t especially carnivorous) who I can rant to, without them asking first, because 1) they will love me no matter how much I annoy them with veggie-talk, and 2) they understand how important this is to me and therefore truly want to hear all I have to say about it.
2. Keep it short
If someone does ask, limit your answer.
I’ve found that the most common question is simply, “Why?” Yes, this is the perfect opportunity to plant a seed of thought in someone, but don’t preach! Keep your answer to a single (or a few) heartfelt sentences then STOP. Although there are tons of reasons to go vegetarian, choose the one that compels you the most (or the one that you think will resonate most with the asker) and briefly state it without going into gory details.
My response is usually something like this, “I read a book about how the animals are treated and it was really disturbing. I decided that I didn’t want to contribute to that anymore.” [Other examples: "At first I did it to lose weight, and then I realized that it was better for the environment, so I stuck with it." "I heard that going vegetarian was greener than switching to a hybrid vehicle, plus it helps prevent cancer."]
The second most common question I’ve encountered is, “How do you get enough protein?” While I’d love to rant and rave about how the Standard American Diet (SAD) actually has too much protein and that’s causing issues from obesity to osteoporosis, (and why don’t you worry about your own cholesterol intake instead of my protein levels!), I refrain my urges and politely say something like, “All vegetables, and believe it or not even fruit, has protein in it! I make sure to eat plenty of high-protein ones like, beans, nuts, peas, and spinach, and I can get more than enough of my daily value.”
If they continue to ask questions, of course continue to answer, but I still recommend you be conservative on the amount you spout out. Try to keep answers to a few sentences and only continue when another question is asked, or when someone seems genuinely interested in learning more.
Occasionally I’ll follow-up with people if they truly seemed interested (and if it’s someone I know well enough that their first impression of me won’t be ‘preachy vegetarian’!). Maybe I’ll shoot them an email with something like, “Since it came up yesterday, just thought you’d be interested in this article about free-range eggs. (link)”
3. Be positive
Nobody likes a Debbie Downer (even if you’re discussing something as morbid as clogged arteries). It is better to discuss how vegetarianism is good, rather than how eating meat is bad. This is as simple as changing “meat-eaters are five times more likely to die from a heart attack,” to “you can reduce your risk of heart attack by 90% by giving up meat, dairy, and eggs.”
Instead of complaining about giving up beef ravioli, share how much you love spinach-artichoke ravioli. Don’t talk about how hard it is to find a tasty vegan cheese (even though, yes, this is a very hard thing to do), talk instead about how easy it is to use meatless crumbles in place of ground beef, and how good they taste (especially in spaghetti sauce, sloppy joes, and tacos… mmm) .
If the conversation starts to go down the doom-and-gloom path (like animal abuse, slaughterhouse filth, or environmental destruction), don’t hang around in the “meat is murder/do you know how much fecal matter you’re consuming?/the planet is doomed” area too long. Be sure to make it clear that vegetarianism is a solution. “A vegan saves 100 animal lives per year.” “Going vegetarian is greener than switching to a hybrid vehicle.” (Can you tell I like this factoid?)
4. Don’t condemn
Do not, under any circumstances, imply that someone who eats meat is bad. (After all, you probably ate meat at one point in your life as well.) People will become defensive and shut you off if you tell them that something they are doing is wrong. Remember that most people are not intentionally eating animals to be cruel; they just haven’t learned any better… yet.
5. Practice what you preach
The best way to preach vegetarianism is to set a positive example. Actions speak louder than words. As Ghandi said, “Be the change you want to see in the world.”
The following is inscribed on the tomb of an Anglican Bishop in Westminster Abby (1100 A.D.):
When I was young and free and my imagination had no limits, I dreamed of changing the world.As I grew older and wiser, I discovered the world would not change, so I shortened my sights somewhat and decided to change only my country.
But it, too, seemed immovable.
As I grew into my twilight years, in one last desperate attempt, I settled for changing only my family, those closest to me, but alas, they would have none of it.
And now, as I lie on my deathbed, I suddenly realize: If I had only changed myself first, then by example I would have changed my family.
From their inspiration and encouragement, I would then have been able to better my country, and who knows, I may have even changed the world.
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Any other tips on how not to be a preachy vegetarian?
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Breakfast: Amy’s non-dairy burrito
Lunch: Cabana bowl from Taco Cabana: rice, black beans, lettuce, pico, guac, salsa (no meat, no cheese, no sour cream)
Dinner: A failed attempt at vegan mac & cheese. I ended up overcooking it, so it turned out to be a big gooey mess that didn’t even taste cheesy. But I ate it anyways!
